Lowee Shenanigans
by PokeMarioFan95
Summary: Ah, Nintendo. One of the best companies the gaming industry has to offer. But not even it can escape from the most unexpected and random of moments. Here are some wacky adventures in the daily life of Lowee.
1. The Prolouge to End All Prolouges

**WARNING: EVERYTHING IN THIS FANFIC, INCLUDING CHARACTERS, ETC., BELONG TO THEIR RESPECTIVE OWNERS. THE FANFIC, ORGINAL CONTENT, AMONG OTHER THINGS, BELONG TO ME.**

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 **POKEMARIOFAN95 PRESENTS...**

 **A "HYPERDIMENSION NEPTUNIA" & "SUPER SMASH BROS." FANFIC**

 **"LOWEE SHENANIGANS"**

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North of the realm of Gamindustri lies the nation of Lowee. Under the rule of the CPUs Blanc, Rom, and Ram, this nation prospers as one of the best nations in the whole continent. It's famous for its family-friendly appeal, beautiful white scenery, and memorable cast of characters, who are currently in the Basilicom. Sometimes, they will be pitted in a fighting tournament to see who remains on top. Said tournament is so famous that even places not related to Lowee broadcasts it, and they were even put to game form. And that's what's happening right now.

In the skies above the nation's main city is an arena. From within, a cheering crowd can be heard. They're practically enjoying what's going down in the center of the arena. A man in red attire, blue overalls, a hat that hats an "M" on it, brown shoes, and iconic mustache is fighting against a slightly taller version of himself, with green clothes, a hat with an "L" on it, and slightly different mustache. The jumbotron shows their names: "Mario" and "Luigi". Somewhere within the crowd, a special booth can be seen. In it were the CPUs and their Oracle, Mina, with two giant living gloves next to them on either side. They're known as Master Hand and Crazy Hand, creators of the tournament (aptly named "Super Smash Bros.") and defenders of Lowee.

They were watching the battle unfold (how could the hands watch the match? Psychic powers?), monitoring to see if it all goes well, much like sport officials. The most excited of the bunch was Ram, who was cheering for both fighters and imitating their attacks. It was going smoothly. Until, something happened. And that something caught everyone off-guard.

Mario was returning to the stage after being launched. Luigi decided to end it by jumping and performing a Meteor Smash. Of course, he's scared of heights, so he missed. This gave Mario chance to recover with his Up-B. That is, until Mario's first frame of animation froze. What seems to be the problem? He looked up to see that he uppercutted Luigi...on his unmentionables. Both brothers are frozen in midair. Luigi looked down and realized what happened after reality kicked in. The look on his face tells that he was suffering from an immense amount of pain, tears forming on his eyes. Without the urge to resist anymore, he slowly looked up and screamed in a voice that would make opera women jealous. And so, Mario finished his animation, with damage adding up to 999%, and Luigi was launched upward, losing his last stock. Mario eventually made it back to the stage, but he was trying to process what just happened.

It's not just him, though. EVERYONE who saw this display were trying to get over it. The audience, the CPUs, Mina, the hands, even the TV viewers. These viewers include the rest of the Smashers, who were at the Basilicom, watching the match in a huge HD TV. Their reactions are the same, except for Dr. Mario, who just said "I've should've done that years ago." This comment got "The heck?" looks from the others. King Dedede then said, "What about Ryu?" The martial artist then cringed at the thought. If this ever happened in a fight, this would make his Shoryuken broken beyond repair. "It's so OP, it destroys ALL the games!", as Neptune once said. Opponents must defeat his Shoryuken to stand a chance? Yeah, good luck with that.

Others who know any sort of uppercutting move looked at their fists, then winced at the future outcome. And what about those that knows air kicks, like Zero Suit Samus? Even them got the same reaction. And don't get me started on the swordfighters, since there is a possibilty that they will slice groins in half. Especially Cloud, who owns the biggest and heaviest sword out of all the sword users, which can do quite the amount of damage. Basically, all the Smashers winced at the different results of the outcome, and they're not pretty.

After everyone recovered from the shock, Master Hand was confused. "Um, my lady? Does that count as a win?", he asked. Blanc thought for a moment. "Well, let's count that as a win. I'll fix this later.", she said. And so the right-handed glove announced Mario's victory, even though the situation was still awkward. A few days after the match, the display made headline news. Poor Luigi's in a bed, recovering right now, with his fellow Smashers and Loweeans sending him "Get well" cards and the whatnot. Blanc, her sisters and Mina visited him and gave him their share of gifts, with Rom hugging him at the end their visit (and who doesn't say that was cute?). The other CPUs (with their respective mascots) also saw the poor plumber, sending their gifts as well. Mario even apologized to his bro at one point. Luigi didn't accept it at first because he was mad and embarrassed at the same time, but he made up with Mario afterward. After a few weeks, he's now in tip-top shape and everything's right with the world. Blanc even fixed the system by counting any hits to the groin as normal amounts of damage. Surely, this'll prevent any OP-ness from happening (and any further suffering for those affected).

But what they didn't know is that this is the start of a chain of events so great, it'll only end in hilarity. This is the start of something called...Lowee Shenanigans.


	2. Chapter 2: To Hug a Rom

A/N: This may be the longest chapter I have ever written for a story. Ever. Enjoy!

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Lucina was confused.

Just a few minutes ago, she received a mysterious letter which says "Come to the conference room, down the entrance hall to your left. We'll be seeing you there." Just who is this "we"? And what do they want with her? A lot questions raced around the blue-haired princess's mind. She eventually approached the "conference room", which is just the storage room. On the sign on the door that read "Storage Room", a piece of paper was taped with the words "Conference Room" written in poor handwriting. Not wanting to waist anymore time, Lucina entered the room.

Inside it, a ceiling lamp showed four men sitting on boxes around a larger box. They must be playing some sort of card game. Lucina approached the group of men as they were so concentrated on the game, they did not notice her presence. "Got any sevens?", asked a man in green. Another with blue hair, one with red hair, and a buff-looking one with purple-ish hair looked at him. They checked their hands. "Nope.", said the blue-haired one. "Nada.", said the buff one. "Well, I got these.", said the red-haired one. He showed his hand and the reactions of the other three were priceless. "A ROYAL FLUSH!?", yelled the green one. "Wow. Just wow.", said the blue-haired one. "If this were poker, you win ALL THE MONEY.", said the buff one. "You're lucky that this is Go Fish." Looking at his hand again, the red-haired one was surprised.

"Link? Marth? Roy? Ike?", asked the princess. They all looked at her, dumbfounded. "You saw that?", asked Marth. "Oh, only all of it.", said Lucina. No one reacted, except Roy, who just said "Heh." Link asked her after a few moments of awkward silence, "What are you doing here?" "I believe this note belongs to you?", said the princess as she showed them the letter. They recognized the handwriting: it belonged to Ike. Looking at the letter, Ike immediately locked all the doors and checked all of the boxes to see if Snake is hiding in any of them. And, surprise surprise, they did find him. And, of course, the famous red exclamation mark popped from Snake's head with its familiar sound effect.

With an unamused reaction, Ike asked the spy, "What are you doing here?" "What? Lady K-Sha is on vacation, and I grew tired of Lastation, so..." "Nonsense.", said Marth. "I saw you come here before." How? Snake started to panic in his head. "No wonder we don't see you here frequently. This is where you usually go to because Lastation's Basilicom LACKS A STORAGE ROOM. Whatever Lady Noire considers unnecessary is either donated or thrown away to save space." Snake started to sweat from nervousness. "Also, K-Sha is now with the Golden Third to stop a horrible monster rampaging in a field. She didn't tell you because she doesn't want to see you hurt." Snake's eyes grew big. She did that? That's mighty generous of her, but still, he basically destroyed giant metal mechs in his games, so why not monsters as well? "Admit it, Snake. THIS IS YOUR PARADISE." Secret. REVEALED. Snake didn't expect that to happen. And how did Marth know all of this? Did he went to Lastation by any chance? Did he use the Internet to find that info? Why am I asking all of these questions? Here's your answer: THE WORLD MAY NEVER KNOW. With no comment to counter with, the spy shown himself the door and exited the room in defeat. Ike locked the door again so that the so-called "meeting" will start.

They sat around the larger box with a fifth box for Lucina. After a few moments of silence, Link asked the princess, "So. We called you for a reason. You love cute stuff, don't you?" Lucina's face started showing a light shade of red. "What in the name of Lady White Heart are you talking about?", asked Lucina. "Let me rephrase the question", said Link. "Your mother is a certain pegasus rider, correct?" The princess nodded. "Her love for cute things are off the charts. Since heredity is such a huge factor in your game, perhaps the same way goes to you. Remember the day you met Lady Rom?" Lucina remembers that day like it was yesterday.

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It was an honor to finally meet her goddesses in person, and all was going well. Until she saw Rom, and this was while she was talking. Her shyness, her quiet voice, her sweet nature, her eyes that doesn't need the puppy-eyes maneuver to convince people. Everything about her just screams "cute". To levels over 9000, that's for sure. During the whole meeting, she resisted the urge to express how adorable Rom is, and this is coming from a serious character. That whole time, her face was red and sweating, not making sure if she was paying attention to anything Blanc or her sisters said. After the meeting, she went back to her room, ignoring everyone that she passed. She closed and locked her door. And then...her true feelings went galore.

After what appears to be a while, Ike was seen conveniently walking around that very same corridor. He eventually passed by Lucina's room, which was somehow louder than other times he went there, which was quiet. Usually, the princess would do things that require silence, but this time, it was loud as heck. Curious, Ike pressed his ear to the door. Lucina was screaming happily at the top of her lungs, expressing everything that made Rom the cutest thing she had ever seen. Ike wasn't surprised: he had those very same opinions, but it wasn't over-exaggerated, like Lucina's. He stood there for a few more minutes, until the princess mentioned that she wants to "hug Lady Rom and pinch those adorable cheeks." Ike wouldn't blame her: EVERYONE (even the author) who saw Rom, human or HDD (mostly human), will do the very same thing. Just then, a light bulb popped out of his head. Rubbing his hands with a devious look on his face, he ran straight towards his room and wrote that very same letter. He then secretly sent it to her by sliding it into her room from the bottom of her door some time later. This is when Lucina got the letter. He then told his fellow comrades, Link, Marth, and Roy about it. Apparently, those three also share those same interests. This is when they used the storage room as their "conference room".

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Back to the present, Lucina was nervously looking downwards while twiddling her thumbs. She looked at the Hyrulian warrior. "Yes, I did. And how did you know that?", she said. Ike explained everything about what happened during her outburst. "There's a thing called 'privacy', y'know?", the princess said embarrassedly. Ike once again wore his unamused face and said, "Well, SOR-RY for making it so loud that the whole entire Basilicom can hear it." Lucina just blushed.

"Anyway", said Link. "The point is that cuteness is one of mankind's biggest weaknesses. In nature of cute things, we give in, and it doesn't matter who, aside from those who are heartless. As instinct, we hug 'em, we pinch them cheeks, we yell all the things the makes them adorable. Say for example, babies, teddy bears. Even Pikachu and Kirby. And now, Lady Rom." After a few seconds of silence, Link continued. "Not to worry, Lucina. We share your very same interests. Of course, we don't do this to Lady Rom since we respect her and treat her as our leader." The other men crossed their arms, closed their eyes, and nooded in agreement.

"This is when THIS comes in." Roy slammed a calendar showing the month of November. Text can be read on the 21st; "Rom & Ram's Birthday!" He pointed at the event and explained. "Tomorrow is the twins' birthday. Lady Blanc says that it's OK to give the twins a hug to say 'thank you for everything.' This is our chance to give in to the kawaii incarnate that is Lady Rom." Lucina's interests has been peaked. "But there's a catch.", said Marth. "Lady Blanc says that we can give them a hug 'without going too crazy.' So if we don't want to see her slam us to the ground, we must not give in Lady Rom's cuteness fully. Remember that." Lucina nodded as she takes in the information.

Ike looked at Lucina with serious eyes. "Should we accept this mission, we will be risking our lives. It will be difficult, but the results will prove possitive if it's accomplished. What do you say?" The princess thought for a moment. This is her chance to finally be able to hug the most adorable leader Gamindustri had ever made. She should thank the True Goddes for giving such an opportunity. But, at the same time, she would risk being beaten senseless by Blanc. There's a lot of risk and reward involved in all of this, which makes it sound interesting. She looked at the group of men and seriously told her response, "I'm ready." "Alright!", said Link. "We'll meet at the dining hall tomorrow at 1500 hours, according these here invitations!" He showed the group five cards telling about the event, including date and time. He gave one of each to them, keeping one for himself. "When that time comes, we'll finally be able experience what it looks like to hug something as adorable as Lady Rom. DISMISSED!" Everyone stood and gave Link a salute. They then exited the room while marching like soldiers.

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 **TOMORROW...**

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The dining hall is filled to the brim with the festivities. Decorations, food (which Neptune was found gulping it all down), gifts, and even those who are invited. While 90% of them are Loweean residents or characters that appear in Nintendo games, some of the others include the other CPUs, Lowee's generals, and the Golden Third (who just returned from their monster-hunting trip in one piece. Also, if you see Sonic, Pac-Man, Mega Man, Ryu, Cloud, and Snake in the party, they and Neptune insisted Blanc to invite them. She did, but she wasn't happy about it since she was very much forced to do so). Since there are so many Nintendo characters, Blanc only invited a selected few. If she invited all of them, the Basilicom would explode. Imagine if she invited all of the Fire Emblem characters. The results would be disastrous. Thank goodness that this did not happen. And also, sitting in special seats, are the guests of honor, the birthday girls themselves. Ram was happily bouncing in excitement, while Rom patiently waits. From the mass of people, a familiar group of swordsmen are waiting.

Link looked at his watch. "Where's Lucina? She should be here 5 minutes ago.", he said impatiently. Just then, she found them. "Sorry I'm late.", she said panting. "What took you so long?", asked Roy. Lucina looked at Roy. "I had to use the bathroom." The red-haired swordsman looked at the princess with a suspicious gaze. He then shrugged it off and said "Okay." The group then looked at their cute leader sitting on her throne-like chair, now twiddling her thumbs. "What do we do now?", asked Marth. Ike looked at Marth, then back at Rom. "Now, we wait.", he said.

Some time had passed. A fanfare made from trumpets played. A Basilicom staff member appeared with a scroll on his hands. "Ladies and gentlemen! Presenting, the CPU of our nation! Blanc!" The mass of people began to clap and cheer loudly as the brunette appeared with Mina on her side. They walked to where the twins are and announced that there will be some activities before saying "Happy Birthday!" to them, to the disappointment of Link and co. But if this is the only way to hug Rom, then participate in the activities they shall.

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After all of that, singing the birthday song, and eating cake (which Neptune almost ate entirely), Blanc then asked the people to give their word of thanks to her sisters. "It's time.", said Ike. The group then approached to where they are. Of course, they want to save the best for last, so they chose to say thank you to Ram first. And they have to wait in a long line. How cliché. But eventually, they did approach the pink-coated leader, said their thanks, and saved their hugging strength by giving her a handshake. Ram expected something better from them, but blame her snotty attitude.

And so, the moment of truth has arrived. Their excitement cannot be contained any longer as they walked towards their blue-coated leader. And they had to wait in another long line. But the wait would be worth it. Judging from the reactions from some of the people who did it, they walked by with happy faces and some sort of sparkling effect surrounding their heads? Is hugging Rom really that amazing? Now Lucina and co. are curious beyond their limits.

And so, it was their turn. The swordsmen then told Lucina to do the honors first, since she was the most excited out of all of them. The princess's heart started to beat faster and faster the more she approached Rom. When she was already next to her, it didn't take long for Lucina to say her thanks. "Um, my lady. Thank you. For everything. Our nation wouldn't prosper without you here." Taking in those kind words, Rom gave the princess a sweet smile, which made the background all pink and sparkly. "You're welcome...", said the Candidate with softest of voices, and later with the cutest of giggles. And with that, Rom gave the princess what she had hoped for; a hug. For a second, all the colors went inverted before reality kicked in. Lucina looked down towards the Candidate. Is this a dream? It most certainly is. But it's actually not. Without hesitation, the princess hugged her leader back. The swordsmen behind her were SHOCKED. She did it. She actually did it. It was heartwarming sure, but this does not stop Ike from punching the wall next to him, Roy from banging the table with his fist, Marth stomping heavily to the ground, or Link vomiting a rainbow. It was adorable. TO THE MAX.

Eventually, Lucina left the embrace, which seemed eternal. She then passed the swordsmen. Link called her, which stopped her in her tracks. He then asked, "So? How did it go?" The princess turned around to see the most happiest of faces while the background turned all pink and sparkly. Again. "Well...you could say it's the best thing you'll ever do.", she said before turning back, this time sparkle effects surrounded her head. Was it really that amazing? The swordsmen started to argue about who was going first.

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 **AFTER THE PARTY...**

* * *

Back in the "conference room", the group sat down on their boxes again. They all have the same reaction as Lucina. "Well, guys.", said Link. "Mission accomplished. Now our lives are complete." The other nodded in agreement. Ike then stood up and unsheathed Ragnell. "And whoever thinks that Lady Rom ISN'T adorable...", he said as he turned around and pointed his sword at the camera. "...YOU. WILL. **DIE.** " He then poked the camera with his sword, causing it to crack before finally breaking apart.

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A/N: So, yeah. Take Ike's advice and you won't be hunted down by a mob of angry fans! I promise, the results are guaranteed to be good!


	3. To Hug a Rom (Alt End)

A/N: I was originally supposed to use this ending in Chapter 2, but I used another one instead. So here's an alternate ending of sorts for it! This continues from after the activities are done.

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After all of that, singing the birthday song, and eating cake (which Neptune almost ate entirely), Blanc then asked the people to give their word of thanks to her sisters. "It's time.", said Ike. The group then approached to where they are. Of course, they want to save the best for last, so they chose to say thank you to Ram first. And they have to wait in a long line. How cliché. But eventually, they did approach the pink-coated leader, said their thanks, and saved their hugging strength by giving her a handshake. Ram expected something better from them, but blame her snotty attitude.

And so, the moment of truth has arrived. Their excitement cannot be contained any longer as they walked towards the blue-coated leader. And they had to wait in another long line. But the wait would be worth it. Judging from the reactions from some of the people who did it, they walked by with happy faces and some sort of sparkling effect surrounding their heads? Is hugging Rom really that amazing? Now Lucina and co. are curious beyond their limits.

And so, it was their turn. The swordsmen then told Lucina to do the honors first, since she was the most excited out of all of them. The princess's heart started to beat faster and faster the more she approached Rom. When she was already next to her, it didn't take long for Lucina to say her thanks. "Um, my lady. Thank you. For everything. Our nation wouldn't prosper without you here." Taking in those kind words, Rom gave the princess a sweet smile, which made the background all pink and sparkly. "You're welcome...", said the Candidate with softest of voices, and later with the cutest of giggles. And with that, Rom gave the princess what she had hoped for; a hug. For a second, all the colors went inverted before reality kicked in. Lucina looked down towards the Candidate. Is this a dream? It most certainly is. But it's actually not. Without hesitation, the princess hugged her leader back. The swordsmen behind her were SHOCKED. She did it. She actually did it. It was heartwarming sure, but this does not stop Ike from punching the wall next to him, Roy from banging the table with his fist, Marth stomping heavily to the ground, or Link vomiting a rainbow. It was adorable. TO THE MAX.

Eventually, Lucina left the embrace, which seemed eternal. She then looked up to see something that her blue eyes wished they never want to see again. Someone was hugging Ram. And that someone was Shulk. Lucina asked the visionary, "Um, what are you doing?" He looked at the princess. "What? I'm hugging Lady Ram. Why?", he said as Ram playfully stuck her tongue out to the princess. Lucina then asked, "Why not Lady Rom?". He looked at the adorable brunette, then back at the princess. "Sorry. I'm not into shy people."

SHOCK. Such cold words have hit Rom, Lucina, and her fellow group of friends behind her. Of course there would be haters, it's inevitable. But instead of ignoring him and accept his opinion, the princess looked down and tears started dripping from her face. It's clear that she won't take this lightly. "You...", she murmured. Shulk didn't understand what she just said, so he asked, "Pardon?" Lucina looked up. "You cruel, HEARTLESS MONSTER!" And with that she unsheathed Falchion and pointed it straight at his face. Shulk doesn't understand what's going on. "I'm sorry, but what heck is going on here?" The princess started screaming, which caught the attention of some of the people attending the party. They approached to her side. "You don't notice how sweet and innocent this child is!?" The Monado wielder yelled as other people went to his side. "Yes, I do! But I told you that shy people are not my thing!" Eventually, all the attendees picked their sides; those who support Rom, and those who support Ram. Blanc, Mina, the other CPUs, Blanc's generals, and the Golden Third watched the scene unfold in front of them, with Neptune somehow eating popcorn. The twins were scared to their wits.

After a few moments of silence, Lucina then told Shulk, "Well, then. Perhaps we will educate you about how cute Lady Rom is!" The blue-clad brunette is confused. Is she really that cute? No wonder many people say "awww" the second they saw her. The princess then grabbed a piece of cake and threw it at the visionary. Everyone gasped at the display. After licking the cake off his face, he grabbed some jelly and threw it at Lucina, which is now stuck to her nose. Toon Link then appeared out nowhere and yelled "FOOD FIGHT!" And so it began, both sides flinging food by the millions while yelling "Rom is better!" or "Ram is the best!". Even though it was a food fight, it was also part Smash, with projectiles ranging from fireballs to Gordos thrown everywhere, with the occasional Smash fights here and there. Throw some items, KO blasts, star KOs, and characters being splatted towards the screen into the mix, and you have one heck of a doozy here.

Mina was surprised that a birthday party eventually turned into this. But then, Blanc called her name in a tone that does not seem pleasant. The Oracle asked, "Yes, Blanc?" The CPU's face wasn't all that happy anymore. It was like she's a ticking time bomb, with the occasional eye twitch. "Get the kids and let's get out before I do something I might regret later." Obeying her command, the Oracle got the twins and ran away. Blanc looked at the other CPUs, her generals, and the Golden Third, and yelled "Get out!" Everyone complied, except Neptune, who refused and instead joined the fray (because she wants the food, obviously), with Nepgear ultimately failing to get her sister back. Eventually, they, with Blanc in tow, left the premises, leaving everyone back in the dining hall a day they'll never forget.

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A/N: So, yeah. Second ending for Chapter 2! I hoped you enjoyed it!


	4. Chapter 4: Shorts Collection

A/N: Here are a couple of funny shorts. This is gonna be good. *grabs popcorn*

* * *

"Hey, Corrin. If I remember correctly, you can turn into a dragon, right?", asked a purple-clad man to a white-armored warrior. "Yes I can, Robin.", said Corrin. "You want to see it?" The tactician gave no hesitation. "I don't see why not.", he responded. And so, the dark prince complied to Robin's request. He transformed into a dragon, with water effects and everything. He turned back to normal afterwards. The tactician simply applauded in awe.

The dark prince then asked him, "What about you? Do you have a dragon form as well?" Robin looked at him with a face that looks confused and not confused at the same time. "Well, I don't have a 'dragon form' per se. But do you really want to see it? You might get nightmares for a few weeks." Corrin just pleaded. "Yes, please! I want to see it SO badly!" Robin just shrugged. "OK. You asked for it.", he said. And with that, he snapped his fingers.

There was silence. Corrin expected something amazing to happen, but he guessed not. Just before he accuses Robin of fraud, the sky suddenly got dark. Gray clouds were covering the sky in such abundance that it got black. Among the clouds, purple lightning started to crackle. Thunder stared to roar. Gothic music, with chorus and everything, played. And then, it came.

Descending from the heavens above, a huge, black creature with six wings, six eyes that glow red of hatred, and a long face appeared. The dark prince could not believe his eyes. "Corrin.", said the tactician. "Meet Grima, the Fell Dragon." Said dragon roared so loudly, its sound waves shook all of Lowee, which also shook down all of the snow from the buildings. Corrin was shocked. He had never saw anything so magnificent and terrifying at the same time. He couldn't find the words to form his next sentence, but he eventually did. "L-L-Lady Blanc gave you that creature?", he asked, all shaken and in fear of Grima doing something horrible to him. Robin responded in the most casual way with a smile. "Yes. Isn't it great?", he said. Not wanting to be involved in any bloodshed, the dark prince started to slowly walk backwards until he ran away screaming, "AAAAAAAHHHH! HELP ME MOMMY!"

Robin kept his demeanor. "And there he goes.", he said. "And he didn't even get to hear me talk.", said the Fell Dragon, which might scare Corrin even more. Robin just shrugged. "Oh well. Nothing else to do here, I suppose."

* * *

Pit was curious.

It was a question that was stuck in his head for a long time. And the person he wanted ask was right there in the training room, punching multiple times on a Sandbag. After said Sandbag user finished the combo, Pit approached her. "Hey! Bayonetta!" The angel hunter looked Pit's direction. "Why, if it isn't the angel boy.", she said as she gave one final whack to Sandbag, which was flung across the room. Pit gathered his words and asked her, "In your games, your enemies are angels, right?" She nodded. "Well, what do they look like?" Bayonetta looked at the angel with serious eyes. "Are you sure you want the answer?" His eyes sparking, Pit said, "YES!" "OK.", she said. "But be warned that what I'm about to show you is too ungrateful for your innocent eyes." Those words may have haunted Pit a little, but he kept his curiosity peaked.

The witch then grabbed a few photos from her pocket. "THIS is what the angels in my games look like." Being showed the photo, Pit's happiness became the face of a victim seeing the world end. The angels met NOTHING of what he expected. It's like a combination of an ogre and a cyclops. Add some wings, a halo, a golden weapon, some sort of cloth covering the crotch and butt, and its skin painted gold. "And this is just the henchmen.", said the witch. "They get more terrifying than the last." She then showed him more species of angels, ranging from those that look like dragons, to ones that doesn't look like any kind of recognizable creature at all. Pit's irises gotten shorter and shorter with each new photo.

By the time Bayonetta's done, Pit looked like he saw the far ends of the universe. He expected the angels to look like handsome men, or beautiful women. BUT NOPE. They're monsters. What were they thinking? "Don't blame me, though.", she said. "Blame Lady Platinum. She was the one who made the idea of making 'The Underworld' as you call it the heroes, and heaven as the enemy." After saying that, Pit fainted. Bayonetta sighed at the display before her. "I told him it was too scary for him." Shrugging, she picked up Sandbag and continued her training, hoping to win the next Smash Bros. match, or beat up another Ancient Dragon that so chooses to destroy Lowee.


	5. Chapter 5: Miiverse, Not Youverse

A/N: Another chapter's up and running.

* * *

Technology is evolving at a very fast rate. It came to a point where a lot of people rely solely on this ever-growing medium for their everyday lives. And so, with the recent boom in social networking, Blanc decided to join in on the trend as well. But instead of using existing social networking sites and use them as apps for her current consoles, she decided to make one of her own, where players can share their thoughts, questions, and other cool stuff from their favorite Nintendo games.

The result was Miiverse, Nintendo's (and Lowee's) first ever social networking site, and it all was according to plan. However, what she didn't know is the amount of posts considered to be too inappropriate for younger eyes, despite being on a family-friendly platform. Some time later, a Miiverse stage was added for the Smash Bros. tournament, and...interesting things started to appear for each of the character's supporting communities. However, this one time is the event of the ages, and the whole entire nation shook in fear as a result.

An exhibition match was held on the Miiverse stage. Mario was invited to the battle, so he made his trademark intro once he made it. In front of him was...

"Mama mia! Lady Blanc!?", yelled Mario in surprise. The brunette looked at the plumber. "Hey, Mario. It's been a while." Mario couldn't concentrate on keeping his fighting stance. "W-What are you doing here?", he asked, still shaken that his goddess is challenging him. Blanc gave him a light smile. "Do remember the amounts of...*ahem*...interesting posts on Miiverse?" Mario does find those posts every so often. Even his support community is filled to the brim with what he did to Luigi back in Chapter 1. Like the internet says, "Never forget." The plumber nodded. "Well,...", continued the CPU, "...I wanted to test this out to see what my people think of me. So I created my own support community to see what kinds of posts I will get." Mario became concerned. "But what about those 'bad' posts, my lady?", he asked in a still-shaken voice. Blanc giggled. "Don't worry. I know that they must be trolling. You know how the Internet is.", she said with the most confident of voices. Mario had no choice but to agree with his goddess.

Eventually, Master Hand approached the pair. "So, are we ready to start the match?", he asked. Both nodded. "And a little warning.", he said as he faced the CPU. "Please do not get offended if a 'bad' post appears. Remember your temper." Blanc nodded again, but mentally prepares for the worst. The floating glove started the countdown, and the match began.

Except for the occasional Chapter 1 event posts that caught Mario off-guard, it was going great. Blanc's community was giving positive messages and epic fanart. It was not until the match's climax, however, that it will forever be etched in Histoire's book.

Both had one stock left, and their percentages were pretty high. Just as they're running towards each other for an epic clash, a post from Blanc's community popped up, and...it all went straight down the toilet. It distracted her, prompting Mario to win the match. He remembered the CPU looking at the background. He saw the post, and his face immediately turned to one of terror.

After they showed the results, Blanc and the others entered the video room to watch the replay. Blanc couldn't remember the post very well, and when they saw it...they pooped bricks. The post was making fun of the brunette for "lacking a pair of assets, which Vert proudly owns more than anybody! LOLOLOLOLOL", with a drawing showing its point and everything. Blanc's signature rage face started to form, which terrified Mario and Master Hand. Then, the glove got an idea. He snapped his fingers and teleported the CPU to a training room with an emotionless clone of Green Heart just standing there. Gripping her hammer tight, she turned into White Heart and started to beat up the ever-living heck out of the clone while cursing out the colorful vocabulary no pure pair of ears should ever hear.

The beating took several hours, which Mario and Master Hand are watching casually on a big screen in the video room. The plumber was sitting on the floor, eating popcorn. "Best stress-reliever ever.", said Mario. Even though he had no face, the glove's voice showed a positive reaction. "I know." He faced the plumber. "Can you give me some?" Mario looked at Master Hand. "You don't have a mouth." "Touché.", said Master Hand as he once again faced the screen.


	6. Chapter 6: Shorts Collection 2

A/N: Oh hey, look. Another chapter! BANZAI!

* * *

So, Lucina? Nothing to say about Roy? Let's fix that, shall we?

 **LUCINA:** The Young Lion? Really?

 **ROY:** Oy! ...That hurt...

 **MARTH:** *pats Roy* Don't worry.

 **IKE:** *also pats Roy* She almost says the same thing to us.

 **BOTH MARTH AND IKE:** Blame Lady Blanc.

*meanwhile, in Blanc office*

 **BLANC:** *achoo!* Huh. I could've sworn that I've been blamed for something. *shrugs and keeps reading*

* * *

Legends tell of a participant of the Smash Bros. tournament that was considered so OP, many fear of challenging said foe. And it was all because of one match. Here's a replay stowed away in the Basilicom's secret archives of that day:

\- REPLAY DATA:  
~ Mode: Smash/Normal Smash/Stock  
~ Stage: Battlefield  
~ Characters: Mario (Player 1), Rom & Ram (Player 2)  
~ Date Recorded: January 29, G.C. 2016, 8:59 P.M.

The match started as normal. However, just as Mario was approaching the Candidates, he immediately stopped. What happened? All cameras are now focused on Rom, which appears to be looking at the plumber with the most innocent expression of all time. It was so cute that Mario clutched his heart. But then, the sound effect that plays when you get a home run plays. And what's this? His damage went from 0% to 999% in an instant? And then he got launched backwards and lost all of his stocks in the process!?

"GAME!" *cue results screen*

Meanwhile, in Planeptune, Neptune felt a disturbance...

"I sense a glitch in the game, as if a fighter just won a battle without any effort..."

"Uh, Lady Neptune? Who are you talking too?", asked Sonic. "Nobody in particular.", said the purple-clad girl. "But I felt a strange glitch in Lowee..." Sonic just rolled his eyes. "Alright, whatever.", said the blue hedgehog as he zipped away for reasons unknown. Neptune still wondered what that was.

*back in Lowee...*

This does not happen just to Mario. It can also affect everyone else, and sometimes it can produce different results. For Ganondorf, he just commits self-destructs. For Lucina, well...those who read Chapter 2 can take a lucky guess. For Cloud, he was unaffected, and the twins have to fight him as normal. Even the audience goes "awww..." once they witness the moe blob that is Rom after perfoming one of her victory poses. As for Ram, she sees this as the best way to cheat their way to victory. It was not long until Blanc stepped into the matter.

She released an update patch for the sport that fixed the damage caused by Rom's cuteness. Although the fighters are still afected by this (except for a few), the after-effects are long gone, and now the fights can go on as expected. Ram did not approve of the change, but, like I said before, blame her snotty attitude.

* * *

And so, Blanc was minding her own business when suddenly...a wild Neptune appeared! "HEY, BLANNY!", yelled the purple CPU, scaring the brunette. She looked back and saw Neptune, who so happens to pop out of nowhere (don't ask). "What do you want, Neptune?", asked Blanc on the path to another rage fit. "I discovered something amazing when I activate HDD here in Lowee! You wanna see?", she said in the most happiest voice. The brunette had no choice anyways, since Neptune will pester her until she says yes. "Alright.", she said while crossing her arms.

Neptune pulled out her Sharicite, and started the transformation process as normal. However, something popped up at the bottom of the screen. It's a text box, and it says: "Neptune's Sharicite is reacting to her peoples' faith!" Upon completing the transformation, the text box appeared with new text: "Neptune transformed into Purple Heart!"

Blanc was amazed, but not surprised. "I see you found one of the many Lowee Easter Eggs I made.", said the brunette. The purple CPU's interest has been peaked. "Easter eggs? My human form would love to hunt for those.", said Purple Heart. "I know. I bid you good look on your hunt to find them all.", Blanc said. And so, Purple Heart flew away to find more Nintendo references, which might take a huge load of time, but it wouldn't be a challenge for the purple CPU's human form.


End file.
